Recently we took our boys to one of those indoor trampoline parks. It was a lot of fun! As I was watching my boys jumping with other kids and as I jumped with our four-year-old a little, I started to notice different styles of trampoline jumping. Some of the jumpers were timing their jumps to lift someone else up. Other jumpers could draw the energy from another’s landing to make themselves jump even higher. Some jumpers preferred to jump on a smaller trampoline alone. Others ran from trampoline to trampoline, enjoying the softer landings when they fell. And still others preferred to stay off of the trampolines altogether and they would either stay out of the area or would walk along the solid frames, never stepping off into the trampolines at all.
When I returned home that evening, my mind kept going back to my observations and I thought how similar those trampoline jumping styles are to the way people choose to live their lives. Some people are constantly lifting others and find joy in helping others reach new heights. Other people are skilled at taking someone’s momentum and using it to lift themselves. Some people would prefer to not collaborate with others at all, they don’t give or take. Then there are others who see things differently, who choose to do something others are not doing. And yet there are others who choose to avoid any sort of risk, who prefer to keep their feet on solid ground.
The more I thought about these different jumping styles, the more I wondered, “What type of a jumper am I?” and “Is that the type of jumper I want to be?” If you are asking yourself one or both of the same questions, come along with me and we can think about this together.
Do you lift others? Do you notice those around you and time your comments or actions to help buoy them up? Do you instinctively know when the people around you are coming down and do you intentionally aim to be in just the right spot to help bounce back? The more I thought about this the more I came to understand that to lift is to love. If we genuinely love those around us, we will naturally lift them as our intentions will be pure. Those jumpers who lifted others were happy and were genuinely happy to see someone else jumping higher. And you know what? Most times, both jumpers were jumping higher with each jump as the momentum between the two jumpers continued to build.
Are you constantly taking from others? I am not asking if you are a thief, constantly stealing things from your friends. I am thinking are you typically the one who is seeking others to comfort you and lift you up? Instead of lifting others, do you feel that it is someone else’s responsibility to lift you? I think anyone and everyone can fall into this trap of a mindset from time-to-time. If you have fallen into this trap and are constantly calling the same people only to complain and commiserate without allowing them to express their own complaints and woes with you, maybe this describes you. If you are timing your associations with others so that they will be most beneficial to you, maybe you have become what some experts have labeled a toxic friend. In that same article, Florence Isaacs, author of Toxic Friends/True Friends {Toxic Friends/true Friends: How Your Friends Can Make Or Break Your Health, Happiness, Family, And Career
Do you prefer to jump alone? If so, why? Do you fear getting hurt if you are too close to someone else? Do you have less fun when you are with someone else? Or maybe you just don’t enjoy the company of those around you and you are waiting until you find someone more enjoyable. I think this is another trap we can fall into sometimes, whether in our daily lives or on particular projects. I know that no one who was jumping alone was reaching the same heights as those who were jumping with other people. I saw that. When I was in college, I had a particular class that did not appeal to me at all. Many others in my major (and I thought everyone else in my class) loved this class and the literature we were studying, but it was not my area of interest at all. Our professor gave us a multi-page list of all of the items we would need to study to prepare for our first exam. He told us to form study groups. I refused to join a group because I thought I had little in common with the other students in my class and I would prefer studying alone. I dedicated hours studying everything on the list from my professor—and I failed that first exam. I went to my professor to ask him what I could do better to prepare for the next exam. He said that the only way I would pass any of his exams would be to study in a group. He made the exams so difficult that there really was no other way! From then on, I joined a study group and worked together with them to prepare for each subsequent exam. I finished with a B average in his class, never failing another exam.
Do you prefer to run while others jump? Are you an innovator, always trying new things? Or maybe you just don’t want to be doing what everybody else is doing? If everyone else were running on the trampolines, would you jump? Our unique ideas and actions make this world a beautiful place, but I think the degree of beauty varies depending on the motivation behind those differences. Much like the other jumping styles we’ve considered today, we have to consider why we are choosing what we are choosing. Could we be using our energy for better or higher things? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe we are just trying something different because it is fun, but how long will it remain fun? Do we sometimes feel stuck doing the same different things because we feel that is what is expected of us? At the end of the day, doesn’t that take away the thrill of being and doing different things? If you are stuck doing “different” things that no longer feel satisfying or invigorating to you anymore, it is OK to stop.
Are you still standing on solid ground, refusing to get on the trampolines at all? I get it. Maybe you are recovering from an injury and can’t get out there right now. Set a goal for when you will. Maybe you are afraid to look silly in front of your peers. Maybe you are afraid you’ll fail. These are all valid concerns, but not worth sitting or standing on the edge of life refusing to do what you came here to do. Why would you go to a trampoline park if you weren’t going to jump? I strongly believe that every life has a purpose—how do you expect to fulfill your purpose and reach your potential if you never try?
So what kind of jumper are you? Maybe you are a combination of a few of these. Maybe your jumping style varies with the situation. Maybe, like me, your consideration of who you are and who you’d like to be has motivated you to seek some changes in your jumping style. If so, I wish you the best. If you are already satisfied with your jumping style and seek no improvement or change, maybe you should ask a few friends or family members to tell you what they think your jumping style is. You may be surprised by their responses. Wherever you are in this trampoline park journey, just keep jumping.
